(This is a part of a larger thought, it may be more clear if you start with "... a girl...")
This word first started rolling around in my head last May. I was listening to Chris Brown story tell Jesus healing the woman who had been sick for 12 years. Right there in the story Jesus calls this grown woman "daughter".
Tomorrow night I'm teaching at Sycamore about God's heart for kids, and how kids can listen to what the Spirit tells them. In the midst of that the plan is it'll be pointed out that we are God's children. (1John 3:1)
Really what's been on the forfront of my mind is a picture of me sitting on the couch with God and I am crying. Crying a lot. Letting all the tears flow and the sobs come. Crying because I'm scared I haven't shown him that I love him, nerves that he'll decided I'm not dependable and give up on me. Sitting and crying with these thoughts. But I'm not siting alone. Remember I'm on the couch with God. He's letting me hide in his shoulder as I non verbally voice all my worries and fears.
God is brilliant and loving. When he gave me that picture of my heart he didn't just make it up but used my memory. There was a evening were I was distraught over something that my seem ridiculous to the passer by but to me it was shaking my world. My dad sat with me, crying with me, feeling my sorrow and wanting to take it away. Not because what was hurting me was large and evil but because he is my dad, and he doesn't want to see his daughter in woe. I have never had to prove my love to my dad. He has loved me since before I was born, nothing I do can change that love.
God was using this memory and this picture of my dad to try to tell me with him it's the same. He wants me to go ahead and crawl on his lap and cry about the silly lies that have been running in my mind and ringing out my heart. He wants me to rest at peace and joy in him, in our relationship together instead of always being worried whether or not he is disappointed in me.
